Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Watching her back....

I thought I'd share a sweet story with you guys.

Over the weekend, we went to a birthday party for one of B's pals from school. It was a GREAT party - in a fabulous park, not too many kids, a great sunny day - but the best part was how wonderful her friends are.

When it came time to eat, all the kids sat down at a picnic table, got their plates and napkins, their juice boxes, and were presented with platters of sandwiches.

I'm sure you can guess what kind of sammie was included in the spread. Yup, PBJ.

But I'm not a parent who freaks out about PBJ's anymore. Only if my daughter actually eats one. There were wipes around, so I figured any kid who ate one could just wipe their hands and we'd be fine. Plus, these kids are older now, and much less messy. B goes to a school that allows PBJ's so she's around them all the time. I just don't stress about it anymore. I can't. This is just part of our life moving forward so we just need to deal.

So back to the party.

The birthday girl's dad was telling everyone what kind of sandwiches there were. He's such a nice guy, he apparently made the sandwiches, and he was so proud of them! He called out:

"Yummy Peanut Butter and Jelly!"

"Cream Cheese and Jelly!"

"Turkey and Cheese with NO Mayo or Mustard for the Kids!"

"Turkey with Mustard and Mayo and Lettuce for the Grownups!"

So the kids all sit there, trying to decide what they want, and negotiating with their parents about EXACTLY how much they need to eat before they can have cake.

And out of nowhere one little girl pipes up "We can't eat Peanut butter and Jelly - B is allergic!!!". And NOT ONE of the kids took a PBJ.

I could NOT believe it. My heart melted right there on the spot.

I hadn't said a word to anyone there about her peanut allergy. I just told B quietly that the sammies in front of her had the Peanut Butter but that she could have any of the others.

So the kids had turkey or cream cheese and jelly. And everyone got cake (with frosting!! and chocolate!!!)

Such solidarity. Without B even saying a word. Those little girls are good people.

Just so you know, the turkey sammies went fast. The sight of a bunch of grownups eating tiny little squares of PBJ was pretty funny.


Nicole said...

That's so nice! What great friends she has. I kind of treat pb&j sammies the way you do. My son's former school served them every day. He just ate his lunch from home. I do have one question though. You seem to have been comfortable that the other sandwiches hadn't come into contact with the pb ones. Did you have to check on that? Sounds like it was a great party for everyone!

Following Him said...

My heart just melted. Kids can be cruel, but it sounds like B has a GREAT group of friends :)

alison - said...

Good question from Nicole -- I would like to know what you think about that too!
I think kids are much more compassionate than adults are about food allergies sometimes!

Anonymous said... are amazing. I have seen the kids in the preschool do similar things. They're so much more sensitive than adults, as a group. They just want to enjoy their friends! Yay for them!

Gab said...

Hi Guys - I ABSOLUTELY asked about the prep of the other sandwiches!

Apparently, the PBJ's were a last minute addition by the birthday girls dad so they were made last after all the others. Each type of sandwich was kept in a different tupperware too.

Alexis Ahrens said...

That's awesome, Gab! We should all be listening to these young ones with their infinite capacity for compassion and selfless caring. So sweet!

Anonymous said...

Hi there!

I visit your blog often and am now taking a moment to comment. I could so identify with your story. My little six year old, Gabi,is extremely allergic to peanuts as well. At her school, the kids are very sensitive to her allergy and they refrain from having any peanut butter and look after her, all without us or her saying a single word! My heart just swells with emotion when I see these little K-5'ers beging so kind and compassionate!

And you are right - there comes a time when you just don't worry about it anymore. You just have to accept it and move forward. Otherwise you can make yourself crazy and sick! I am just careful of course she doesn't eat it but other than that you have to Let Go - Let God!
Thank so much for your awesome blog : )


Anonymous said...

I just had a revelation while reading this. will there really come a time when I will be able to still be careful--but let go and let my girl enjoy life!? I sure hope so. It has been exhausting. and next year her preschool will not be pnut free.

Anonymous said...

I think that is wonderful about the other kids not taking a PB&J sandwich, but I don't think I would have let my son have one of the other sandwiches made. How do you know if the knife they used was clean, surface, etc...what about the brand of bread they used which could have cross contamination. I think I would have brought my own. But thats me!

Anonymous said...

Funny how KIDS actually get it and it's the stupid adults who don't (or go beyond that to actually fight for the "right" for PB&J sandwiches, just because their convenient for THEIR kids).

I've found (as a parent of a peanut-allergic kid with a 6+ scale rating) that kids will look out for their friends with allergies MUCH better than adults, staff, teachers, Principals who are trained, even paid to keep my kid safe at school (per state law). Sad.